


Unrequited

by ObsessionTale



Category: Underfell - Fandom, Undertale, underswap
Genre: Drug Use, Fluff, How Do I Tag, M/M, NSFW, One-Sided Love, dealing with shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-07
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-13 19:14:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 9,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7983049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObsessionTale/pseuds/ObsessionTale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So I have a fuzzy idea of what should happen in this fic. I think it'll turn out okay, decent, something like that. Though I doubt it will get the same kind of attention my first did, since that one was linked onto a much more popular fanfiction by Vidoxi. But, ya know, if you stumble across this, feel free to comment and stuff.</p>
<p>This is in absolutely NO WAY related to Blue Gets Freed. Completely separate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dust

Can't find him.  
  
Where's Sans?  
  
Can't find Sans.  
  
He's gone.  
  
Rus teleports around Snowdin Forest. Where in the underground is he? Sans has been missing for a few hours now. Usually this wouldn't bother Papyrus, with work and all, but Sans was late for dinner. He was never late. Not if his life depended on it. Only the worst scenarios played in Rus' head. Sans with a bloody, deep gash in his ribcage. Crimson marrow spreading like some sick ink over his grey shirt. His bandanna ripped and torn in the snow, covered in his own dust. Rus shakes his head and keeps looking. He hears a moan of pain, and snaps his attention to where it came from.  
  
"sans?!" Rus runs over to his little brother. Sans is sitting against a tree. The prints in the snow show a struggle, with whom, Rus doesn't know. He doesn't care. Sans is.. dying. He's actually dying, right in front of his sockets. He's slowly turning to dust, losing feeling in his bones as they start to scatter into a million tiny specks. His ribcage is kicked in, cracked and spattered with spots of red marrow. He doesn't really know why this is what he imagines when he thinks about all the ways Sans could die, and why he can never bring himself to imagine stopping it, like it's already been played out. Sans is crying, his tears leaving clean trains on his dust-covered face.  
  
"Paps, hurts..." Sans tries to sit up from his slumped posture but almost immediately falls back down. Rus refrains from grabbing Sans, for fear of hurting him. Sans lets out a wail of pain when he falls awkwardly on his coccyx. Rus puts a hand on Sans' shoulder.  
  
"sans, what happened?"  
  
"P-Paps.. a human.. that never opened their eyes.." Rus feels the world close in on him. God damnit! A human fell down, he wasn't there to greet it? He wasn't there to evaluate it, to protect his little brother?! He's such a bad brother. He feels something warm against his face, he doesn't even register his tears, just their warmth. Just how uncomfortable it was when they left a sticky feeling in their wake. Sans looks like he's trying to lean away from his dusting arm. On Sans' left, his arm is turning to dust. The particles hover in the air and drift calmly around them, setting the scene with an ashen snow.  
  
"s-sans, don't, don't cry, i'll fix this, you'll b-be fine.." He's lying, but he doesn't know to whom. To himself? To Sans? Surely Sans would know that once you've started to dust, it's impossible to stop. There's never been a case of it. The monsters that occasionally fall down and get taken to Undyne don't turn to dust when they're revived. They just fall comatose.  
  
"Paps, n-no, I--" Sans' jaw starts to dust, and Sans is too scared to talk. He tries to lean forward. He points at his own mouth.  
  
"what, sans, what is it?!" Rus' vision is blurry. Sans is starting to dust faster. Sans shakes his head like he usually does, when Rus refuses to pick up his sock, when Rus plays pranks, makes jokes Sans doesn't like. It's that 'I love you, you goof,' shake that Rus always waited for when he did something silly. Sans leaned forward and pressed his teeth to Rus'. The rest of Sans' body turns to dust, the last feeling Sans had, will ever have, was the feeling of his brother's mouth on his own. Rus hardly even notices the kiss happened. He curls in on himself, on the blue bandanna that Sans left behind. He curls into a ball until he can't anymore, but his soul keeps going, curling into a ball unrecognizable as a soul. His chest feels like a tight cluster of emotion, but also empty at the same time. He can only describe the feeling as losing your other half.  
  
Other half. He's gone. He  _kissed him_ , why the fuck would Sans kiss him?! Sans wouldn't feel like that. He never showed any signs. Was that why he shook his head? Was that why he said 'I love you' twice before bed? Was that why he'd sing songs to Rus like Sans was the older sibling? Rus holds the blue silk close to his chest. He watches his orange-tinted tears fall and darken the silk in spots. He brushed his thumb and smoothed out a wrinkle. It didn't feel soft and smooth anymore like it did when Sans would wear it and insist to be hugged. It felt rough and sharp. He expected his thumb to come away leaking marrow, but it doesn't. He wants to die. He doesn't want this. It's not fair, it's just not fair!  
  
Would Sans want that? Would Sans care? Would Sans be waiting patiently for Papyrus to come up and live with him wherever the dead go? Patiently, for something to happen to Papyrus, but not too soon. Rus can't stop himself. He knows death, he's kept it between his teeth for as long as he's been allowed to. He takes out a small white and brown cigarette, bites down on it softly, and lights it with a worn evergreen lighter. He teleports home and drinks all the alcohol he can find. He wastes all his honey in an hour. He's been sobbing on the couch for what felt like a few years, but in reality it was only about half an hour.  
  
Papyrus stares up at Sans' room. He stands up and starts to move toward it, though it feels like he's wading through sand. Eventually he gains the strength to turn the handle, and opens the door to a cheery room, decorated with light blues and grays, a neat motorboat bed, table of action figures, a computer with the browser open. Rus walks over the computer and searches through the history. Most of it is recipes. Funny cat videos. But here and there he comes across one search, word for word.  
  
How to confess.  
  
It seems to laugh at him.  _You idiot_ , it seems to say,  _you're such an idiot. All this time, you never knew. You moron_ _._ Rus turns off the monitor. He starts looking under Sans' bed. Looking for his favorite thing. It's his job, he's got to find Sans' favorite thing to put his dust on. His phalanges curl around something glass and cold. He pulls out a bong, though it has a very Sans-y touch. Cartoon bone stickers are plastered all over it, making it look almost innocent. But it isn't.  
  
Why would Sans have something like this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know, I got the idea for this fic from a picture made by dragonkun on Tumblr. I can't... really find it right now. If you want to find me on Tumblr, I am obsessiontale. Creative, I know.


	2. Why

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why would Sans have such a thing?

Rus stares at the glass object. It takes him a moment to realize what he's holding, what this means. It means this is just another secret Sans kept from him. He felt angry. Angry that Sans didn't get to finish his life. It's like a story that was cut off. A book with no ending. And angry that he knew far less about his brother than he thought. He takes the blue bandanna out of his hoodie pocket and stares at it, then presses it to his face. He takes a deep breath through it. Yup, the smell's there. This bong was definitely used. He shoves the fabric back in his pocket and rolls the bong back under Sans' bed. There was no question what the dust should go on.  
  
He just wanted answers.

* * *

 

_Sans giggles. He playfully punches Red in the shoulder.  
  
__"Mweheheh! Of course not! Tacos aren't made like that, silly." Red puts his hands up in mock arrest.  
  
__"pfft, how was i supposed to know that?" Red shoves his hands in his pockets. "ya have to 'ave tried once though, right?"  
  
__"Yeah, and they turned out terrible." The two talked late into the night, subject after subject until they ended talking about crushes. Sans coughs and shoves Red away. "Do you have to smoke inside?"  
  
__"no. but i want to. you can't stop me." Sans rolls his eyes.  
  
__"Why should we talk about this anyway?" Red mentions he's just curious. Sans stays silent for what feels like years to him.  
  
__"i told you, you gotta tell me." Red squints. "'s not like it's paps or somethin'." Sans sits up straight, and a few beads of sweat bead on his skull._  
  
_"holy shit blue, seriously? pfftahahah! that's kinky." Sans snaps at Red._  
  
_"I-I-IT IS NOTHING OF THE SORT! It's just a stupid crush.." He looks away. "I want to grow out of it, but I can't. I just think about him, and I get this feeling in my chest.. and whenever I think of myself with another person, it's always him. It's just, always been him. He's perfect..." Sans curls in on himself for a moment._  
  
_"ah, shit, blue, sorry. if you want, i've got something that'll make you feel better."_

* * *

Rus collects all the dust he can from Sans' death site. His hands shake, and staring at the marrow stains in the snow make him want to hurl. He gathers up dust and snow and shoves it into an urn. He'll sort it out later. He's got to find out who gave Sans that infernal thing. His first thought goes to Red. Yes, that makes the most sense. Red was a stoner like no other. He sloppily leaves the urn on the table, next to their pet rock, and teleports to Underfell.  
  
He's in Red's house. Red was avoiding work, laying on the couch and trying to sleep.  
  
"heya," Rus says. He sits down next to Red.  
  
"ugh, what are you doing here. i didn't steal your goddamn honey," Red complains. Rus shakes his head.  
  
"you gave sans something."  
  
"dunno what you're talkin' about."  
  
"you gave him a bong."  
  
"ah, i thought he told you already. how's he doin'?"

"...he died."  
  
"WHAT--" Red sits up and clutches Rus' shoulders. "IF THIS IS A PRANK IT ISN'T FUNNY, YOU SON OF A BITCH." Of course it's not a prank. Rus' face is tear-streaked and tired. His sockets are darker than usual. And there was an occasional speck of dust stuck on his clothes.  
  
"i found out that he.." Rus stares at his legs, away from Red. Red pulls Rus into a hug.  
  
"goddamnit, don't cry, it won't bring him back." But Red's sobbing. He's crying on Rus' shoulder. It's wet and messy. Edge walks in the house and freezes.  
  
"What."  
  
"b-boss, b-blue.." Edge immediately looks worried.  
  
"Well, what happened?!"  
  
"'s gone, boss, he's gone.." Edge blinks and walks back outside, muttering under his breath, though it was clear he was going somewhere quiet to grieve. Rus lets Red let it all out, then Rus starts to rant.  
  
"did sans really love me like that? did he really see me as more than a brother? he kissed me when he died. he's been looking up confessing tips. i can only guess he used that bong to try and feel better because he was scared to ask. why? why would he feel that way? why would he want that kind of relationship? we're brothers. just brothers. why be anything more than brothers? even if i did say yes, it wouldn't last. he's my little brother. he's my baby brother. i'm his big brother. why?" Rus begins to break down. "why? WHY??" 

* * *

  
_Sans sits on his bed with his legs neatly crossed. He recites the instructions Red gave him on how to use this thing. He holds it by the neck (he thinks) and lights a lighter under it. Then he was supposed to breathe in? He took in a long breath, and the inside of the bong seemed to fill up with smoke from out of nowhere. Red told him he needed to do it more than once, so once Sans was done coughing, he tried again, and again, and again, until it felt like he was sitting and standing at the same time. Until the bong felt heavy in his hands and he had to put it down. Until he would stare at his blue-black leggings and laugh at the idea of somehow having a chubby body. He did notice the smell. It smelled awful. He crawls off his bed and walks to the bathroom, though it feels like he's crawling and he's sure he's walking. He didn't even remember why he smoked that stuff, but he felt good. He wasn't sad anymore. His chest didn't ache anymore. He'd do this again sometime._  
  
_Why was he going to the bathroom again? Oh right, the smell. He walks through the bathroom door and looks through the cabinet. There it is! Febreze. He sprays it into the air and smells it. Ah, that's much better. Now to spray it around his bedroom. He looks at the time on the clock in the hallway. If there's one thing he knew, he wasn't supposed to be doing this. Paps would be home from Muffet's soon. He runs to his room and sprays the Febreze, then throws it under his bed, along with the bong._  
  
_Ahh, so hungry! He runs downstairs and takes out a shit-ton of tacos. Then he thinks again and downgrades to a fuck-ton. Did I say downgrade I meant upgrade. He eats all of them, there are only a few left when Paps gets back. Sans' chubby body is a bit bigger, and he knows he'll regret gaining a few pounds but that's a problem for future-Sans. He giggles and waves to Paps._  
  
_"Hey Papy!" Rus stops._  
  
_"heh, 'papy'? haven't heard that nickname in a while. hey sansy." Sans snorts and laughs._  
  
_"That's a nice nickname!"_  
  
_"you sure are happy, huh?"_  
  
_"Of course I am! I love you!"_

* * *

_Rus tucks Sans in, and 'kisses' Sans' forehead._  
  
_"g'night, sans. love ya."_  
  
_"I love you too." Rus starts to leave the room. "Paps!" Here it comes again, when Sans makes sure Rus heard him. Rus smiles and replies like usual._  
  
_"yeah sans?"_  
  
_"I love you!"_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit-ton to fuck-ton joke from The History of Japan (video).


	3. Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when you're the only one to see?
> 
> BGT fans get ready for an epic slight toasting in "paragraph" 2

Rus has been taken into custody. Thrown into a dirty jail cell and told to wait for a lawyer. They say it's because he doesn't have an alibi for being alone with Sans at the time of his death. They were all insane. All fucking insane. The thought of causing any kind of harm to his brother made him want to slam his head against a wall as punishment for even thinking of such a thing.  
  
And somewhere out there, he knew there were people who enjoyed the idea of that happening.  
  
But that's not the point. Rus sits against the dark gray wall and waits. There's gotta be someone who'll represent him. Why would Alphys let the guard jail him anyway? Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe this was the only way she knew how to deal with it. Her and Sans were best friends, sometimes they would hang out so often that Rus would get jealous and--  
  
That's not important. Rus has grown numb to the sounds of his own sobbing. He's used to the ache in his chest when he thinks about Sans. That feeling that seems to tighten up around his soul and make his face hot. Rus can't really describe it. God, he misses Sans so much. He just wants to get out of here, to find that fucking human and bash  _their_ chest in. To make  _their_ family hurt after hours and hours of crying and wishing it never happened. He wanted to watch the human's eyes open and see the pure fear as he kills them like they did Sans. Give them a taste of their own sick medicine.  
  
He's so deep in thought, sitting in the corner of the room, knees to his chest. He's really gone off the deep end. He can't live without Sans. He's grown so dependent. This was probably why they put him in a room by himself, away from the townspeople. To the occasional hall guard, he looks mentally insane. Can't blame them, really. Sometimes he mutters curses under his breath and pulls his hood over his face like he's embarrassed. He probably is. He probably snapped out of it and tried to hide his burning face from anyone who might be in the cell across from his.  
  
He stares at the blank walls, slowly falling asleep. It's not like the bed would be any more comfortable. He has dreams about some small blue figure in the distance. He can't identify it, but he gets that feeling in his chest when he looks at it. His only instinct is to run towards it, but it never draws closer. It's always there, among the horizon, staring back at Rus with wide, black sockets. Sometimes the figure poofs into dust, or just runs away, over the horizon. Once, it ran towards Rus, but faded away once Rus tried to pick it up.  
  
"Alright, Papyrus, we're going." A guard roughly pulls Rus out of the cell. He can only assume a lawyer accepted his case, and now he's being forced to court. They walk into a large building decorated with gold frames and beige walls. He's not really there when the trial starts. He's staring at the table in front of him, or the ground, or the ceiling. The people talking around him get louder and louder until he feels a punch in the shoulder and snaps back to reality.  
  
"huh, what? what is it."  
  
"You're the only witness."   
  
"oh." He walks up to the stand next to the judge. He tries not to talk that much. Some snotty slime monster asks him all kinds of invading questions, and he just answers with 'yes' or 'no'. His testimony is cut off, when he pulls his hood over his face and tries to stop crying. God, he couldn't think about it. He couldn't think about Sans dying, or how Sans kissed him, he was physically unable to speak another word of it. Alphys rushes into the room and picks up Rus, then dashes off with him. Apparently, it wasn't her orders to arrest him.  
  
Rus sits at Alphys' table and drinks some tea. The tea wasn't even boiled, so it's not that good. He'd prefer something warmer, but Alphys had Undyne make her oven and stove cool things down. Alphys is pacing around the room, and Rus just stares at his reflection in the tea, before taking another sip. Someone knocks on the door and they both freeze. Was it Undyne? It could only be Undyne. Alphys opens the door to reveal the human.  
  
Rus stands up and walks over to the human, without thinking, and picks it up by the shirt.  
  
"you little piece of shi-"  
  
The human pressed a button.  
  
The timeline is cut short.


	4. Reset

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the last one was so short. I basically had a writing block for the entirety of it.

Rus wakes up in his bed. He rolls over and hides his face in his pillow. Everything that happened was just a dream to him. He sits up and stretches. He can faintly remember last night, Sans curled up around his arm, snoring softly. Rus had to pry Sans off his arm and carry him from the couch to his room. Sans seemed really clingy lately, like he was in a daze and needed something to hold onto. Hopefully not today. He needed some space from his little brother right now. After that strange dream he kind of wanted to avoid Sans today. He remembers faintly that Sans kissed him in the dream, and it made a chill run up his spine. God, it was so disgusting his brain thought that scenario up. With his brother? No way.  
  
Sans opens Rus' door and peeks in.  
  
"Hey Paps," he whispers. "Time to get up~." He talks in a sing-song voice. Papyrus remembers when he was twelve, and Sans was seven, Rus would sit at the end of Sans' bed and pull on his toes to get him up in the morning. Sometimes Sans did that to Rus too, but mostly he was too embarrassed. Rus crawls out of bed and puts his hoodie on over his black tank top. All he does to get ready to sleep is take it off. He's been wearing and sleeping in the same outfit for a week now. He knew Sans was going to shake his head like that again and nag him about it. The thought makes him smile.  
  
"alright bro, what are we gonna do today?"  
  
"Work. Duh, like we do every day! Today's also laundry day. Are  _all_ of your outfits dirty like last week too?"  
  
"yup."  
  
"Ugh." Sans walks out of Rus' room, with the taller close behind him. They walk out to Snowdin Forest to their sentry stations, Rus' being closer to the Ruins, and Sans' a little further down the path. Rus walked right past his station, and straight towards the Ruins door, to talk to the man on the other side. He sat down against it and knocked. "knock knock..."  
  
"Who is there?"  
  
"amish."  
  
"Amish who?"  
  
"aww, how sweet, i miss you too." Rus snorts at the terrible joke. "you got quite the lisp there." The man across the door howls with laughter. They pass terrible jokes for hours, until Rus spots Sans staring at him down the path. He stands up and says goodbye to the man, and walks over to Sans. "you okay bro? you're staring." Sans shakes his head quickly and smiles up at Rus.  
  
"I was just wondering who you were talking to!"  
  
"oh, it's nobody."  
  
"...Okay. Well, I was thinking on our way home we could get some nicecream."  
  
"sounds good." Sans smiles at Rus' response and starts walking down the path, Rus walking beside him. Sans stares at the trees as they pass them. When they get to the nicecream cart he gets two popsicles, one orange flavored, the other blue raspberry. He gives Rus the blue raspberry one. He reluctantly takes it. Why mix up the colors? Sans usually loved the blue one. Maybe he was trying something new? Then again, Sans and Rus usually stole a bite from each others' popsicles. He knew what it tasted like. Sans licks the popsicle and Rus looks away, licking his reluctantly. The universe is not letting up on him today. First that god-awful dream and now Sans has to act all innocent-like and do this shit. Not to mention when he gets home Sans is gonna make him wear his brother's clothes while his own are getting washed.  
  
"Mnn, this is good!" It starts to melt and Rus just, decides to abscond. He teleports home, leaving Sans dumbfounded. "Damnit."  
  
Rus throws his popsicle away and escapes to his room. Yeah, he knew Sans was doing this on purpose now. Suddenly that dream didn't seem all that fictional. Maybe there was a way to prove it isn't. He walks over to Sans' room, inside Sans' room, and reaches under Sans' bed. He feels something cold and glass. Oh.  
  
No.  
  
It's a bong, decorated with cartoon bone stickers. He stares at it for the longest time, until he can feel a presence behind him. He looks behind himself and sees Sans, arms crossed, not looking very happy that his dearest Paps was snooping around his room.  
  
"You're gonna make a mess of my room, Papy."  
  
"uhh," Rus doesn't know what to say.  
  
"Get out." And with that, Rus puts the glass object down and speeds out of the room.

* * *

  
Sans sits down on his bed, his legs crossed, his elbows resting on his knees and jaw resting on his hands.  _He looked around my room_ , Sans thinks.  _He was looking for it. How did he find it? Why did he just stare at it? Why not yell at me?_ He's been in a daze lately, not exactly from the effects of using that thing. He felt a little pained in his chest, more than just that feeling that curls around his soul when he thinks about Papyrus. Like someone was putting pressure on his ribs, trying to cave them. He felt like Papyrus would make that feeling go away, but it made it stronger. He had a dream where his chest was kicked in by a human who never opened their eyes, and when Papyrus came, he kissed Papyrus. Then he woke up. Usually he forgets his dreams, but he remembers this one, loud and clear like a bell.  
  
He guesses he won't do the laundry today. It's late anyway. He should just get some sleep. But... he could pretend it didn't happen. Papy would probably do the same. And it'd be a nice surprise if Sans sang Papy to sleep again tonight. He stands up and starts towards Papy's room. This might be harder than expected, but he'll do it. Papy is laying in bed, staring at the ceiling. He looks tired.  
  
"Hey..." Papy looks over at Sans.  
  
"hey."  
  
"Can I sing to you?"  
  
"sure."  
  
 _"You are my sunshine,  
_ _my only sunshine,  
_ _you make me happy  
_ _when skies are gray.  
_ _You'll never know dear,  
_ _How much I love you.  
_ _Please don't take my sunshine away."_


	5. It's okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans' perspective. Not one for writing for a really long time, so instead of a few long chapters, have a bunch of short ones.

Sans clears his throat when he's done singing.  
  
"Well, g'night Papy." He holds still for a moment, then leaves the room. When he gets to his own room, he curls up in his bed. "God I messed up... He hates me, clearly..." He falls asleep, yet he wakes up several times in the middle of the night. He's hot and sweaty, and very uncomfortable. He groans, and gets up. "I'm just getting a cup of milk." He walks down the stairs, to the kitchen, opens the fridge. He stares at Papy's empty bag of chisps. He's so messy. Sans grabs the milk and pours it into a cup, then guzzling the milk down. He wipes some milk off his chin, then hears a clatter. He jumps and stares out into the living room. "P-Papy?" Papy was watching him, it looked like he couldn't sleep either. "A-are you okay?" Sans smiles, though it seems forced.  
  
"sans, i, uh..."  
  
"Are you okay?" Sans repeats.  
  
"h.. how do you feel about me?" With that, Sans puts the cup down. He never even closed the fridge. He runs past Papy, up the stairs, into his room. He locks the door behind him and sits against his bed, panting. Man he really needs to exercise more. Somehow he's chubby. Somehow his body felt it was important to rub this fact in his face and always have an ecto-body formed. He didn't know if Papy's body did this too, and he was just really skinny. Sometimes he'd look in the mirror and feel ashamed, or feel really cute. He hoped he was the latter to others, especially Papy. He'd rather be cute than gross.  
  
"sans..." Papy is outside his door. Sans mumbles something. "what was that?"  
  
"Go away."  
  
"why?"  
  
"...Just go away, Paps."  
  
"sans, i know why you have that thing."  
  
"Then why ask."  
  
"because i need to make sure. is it true?"  
  
"Is what true?"  
  
"y-you know.."  
  
"Say it! Say you're ashamed of me. Say you think I'm gross. I am, aren't I? I'm not your 'precious little brother' anymore. I'm just a mistake who can only make and live mistakes!" Sans has his knees curled to his chest, arms wrapped around his legs, face hidden behind them.  
  
"sans, no, you're not a mistake. i'm not ashamed of you. you're not gross." Paps knocks on the door. "can i come in?"  
  
"You're just gonna come in anyway, so go ahead." Paps walks in and sits next to Sans. He puts a hand on Sans' back, petting it.  
  
"can i know why you love me like that?" Sans shakes. He's sobbing.  
  
"I-I don't know! Love is weird. I just, you're just so great! You're tall and strong and wise and smart and I'm just a wannabe nobody... you're everything I'm not, and you're h-hot too, you just happen to be my brother. You're just the perfect person.. for me. But I c-can't be with y-y-you! Everyone will th-think I'm weird, and g-gross, and they'll hate me! Paps, I'll lose the f-f-few friends I have, all because when I-I imagine being with someone, i-it's always you! Why did we have to be related?!" He hiccups and cries harder, Paps pulling him in and hugging him.  
  
"sans, it's okay." Paps pets Sans' back. "it's okay, you're okay, we're okay. you don't have to feel ashamed. i understan--" Sans shoves Papyrus away.  
  
"You don't understand! You have no idea what it's like! You have no idea what it's like to look at you, and get a pain in your soul because you know that you'll never get to be with him, because you know he doesn't feel the same way! Red gave m-me that... thing so I could feel better, and all it's done is made me sick!" Sans picks the bong up from under his bed and throws it at the wall. It shatters and sprays water everywhere. Sans collapses and sits down again, curled back up again, but now he reeks of pot. "I never asked to feel this way! I never asked to be this way!"  
  
Paps sighs and pulls Sans back in again.  
  
"but you never asked. i just never thought about it before. sans, i got that feeling too. i just didn't identify it. i didn't know what it was." He holds Sans close. "i love you too, you don't have to throw a temper tantrum, baby bro." Sans growls.  
  
"I'm not a baby, Paps."  
  
"heh, i know." They laugh, the happy sound replacing both of their crying.


	6. Fantasies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't know??? I'm not planning ahead??? It's still Sans' perspective. Still super short.

Sans and Paps sit like that for a while. Sans sitting in Paps' lap, Paps slowly rocking him, petting his back. He couldn't ask for anything more. He doesn't even care how Paps knew-- how did he know?! He sits up a little and looks Paps in the eye.  
  
"H-hey, how did you know?"  
  
"i had a dream, and, it was real? i think it was a real dream, like a separate reality. you.. died, and kissed me, and i found that thing under your bed while looking for your favorite thing, but after a while a just woke up. it seemed longer than a normal dream though. and i just, i knew it was real, so i had to check, and it was. but i'm glad you're not dead anymore." Paps rests his forehead on Sans'.  
  
"Yeah, I'm glad I'm not dead too." Sans giggles nervously, "mweheheh..." Paps rocks him for a bit. He looks sad. "But, are you okay? You never answered." Paps nods. He's fine. Sans hums and rests his cheekbone against Paps' chest, falling asleep like it was the most comfortable he could be. Paps doesn't fall asleep as quickly. He watches Sans drift off and gets that lovesick feeling in his chest again. God, he's so cute. He's mad he never noticed before. He's mad he wasn't able to identify that feeling in his chest earlier. Sans is just so.. precious. He's got this happy aura about him. Guess they were both hiding something sad. Sans was hiding his hatred for himself, and Papyrus... He doesn't know. He doesn't know why he's so goddamn depressed! He feels like he's living the perfect moment right now-- and he's asleep. His dreams are usually so terrifying and awful. He's being attacked, he's alone in the darkness, he's chasing a blue...  
  
Sans is dreaming, too. He's had dreams where he tries to deal with his problems, or force his feelings for Papyrus away. Sometimes an orange blur will try to absorb him. It's fuzzy, with indefinite edges and round, like a blob. He tries to push it away, but it keeps coming, pressing on his chest and holding him softly, petting his back, whispering sweet nothings. Sometimes Sans will stab it, sometimes he'll accept it. Mostly he just cries, mutters apologies to no-one in particular. He hates, _hates_ that he loves someone he shouldn't. It would be fine if they weren't brothers. Nobody would care. But everybody would if they found out. The petting felt real this time, the warmth made him happy. He hugs the blob back, and it starts to take a shape. After a moment, Paps is staring back at Sans. Lazy, loving eyes. Sans sighs happily and cuddles with this dream-Papyrus. He loves Paps... shouldn't be ashamed.   
  
They both wake up at the same time, which is a rare occurrence. Sans and Paps meet eyes, but Sans looks away after a second, face blue. He crawls off of Paps' lap and stands up.  
  
"W-well, I should, uh, change out of my pj's, huh?" He awkwardly speeds over to his closet and hides in it. He starts taking off his pajama shirt and jumps when Papyrus opens the closet door. He stares up at Paps. "U-uh?" Papyrus sits down next Sans.  
  
"can i change with you?"  
  
"I.. I guess, but, you-you're not gonna start appearing e-everywhere I am, right?"  
  
"pfft, no. that'd be rude." Sans sighs and pulls his shirt all the way off, quickly putting on his regular shirt. Papyrus doesn't really need to change. He slept in his normal clothes, which makes Sans confused.  
  
"You don't need to change."  
  
"i, uh, i know."  
  
"What did you really want?"  
  
"...nothing. don't worry about it." Papyrus looks away and scoots a little closer to Sans.  
  
"U-uh, you-you don't w-want, uh, that, do you?"  
  
"uhm, sorry."  
  
"Oh g-gosh, uh, w-wowzers, I've uhm, fantasized but I don't think I can actually--"  
  
"how do they go?"  
  
"How do what go?"  
  
"the fantasies?"   
  
"O-oh, uhm.." Sans looks a little embarrassed. "I-I guess it wouldn't hurt to s-say... uhm..." He thinks for a moment. "S-sometimes, when I can't sleep, I imagine scenarios so I start dreaming, and sometimes, in them, I... you l-let me stay under your s-sentry post and uhm.. w-well I sit under the post between your legs and I p-pleasure... you..." He lets out a breath. "An-and sometimes it's the other way around, with you under... B-but mostly it's just us, uh, f-'fucking'?"  
  
Papyrus is appalled. Jesus Sans was really much less innocent than he thought. God that was hot though. Under-the-table sucking, that was, really fucking hot. He could feel the air in the closet starting to heat up, and he scoots away from Sans to put more cool air between them.  
  
"A-are you even gonna comment?"  
  
"oh, uh, that's... i dunno. it's good you told me."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"...i'll tell you later." Right. Sans has been hating himself for.. maybe years now. He should help him feel better.


	7. Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh, sin. You have been warned. I wrote this one instead of sleeping sooo
> 
>  
> 
> im bad at sin im sorry

Sans sighs. Man he hardly got any sleep last night. He sits at his sentry post, tapping fingers on the counter idly. He looks around and yawns. God, he's tired. Sans crosses his arms on the counter and rests his head in them. Maybe he'll just sleep here for a bit. Just can't let Papyrus see him. He sleeps for a while. Fifteen, thirty minutes, sometime around then. He jumps awake when he feels something rub against his legs. He looks down at his legs.  
  
"P-PAPYRUS?!"  
  
"hey."  
  
"HOW DID YOU GET DOWN THERE???" Paps shrugs. He probably teleported down there. He moves forward, resting his chin on the chair, right in front of Sans' pelvis. Sans covers his mouth, his face is flushed a beautiful shade of cyan. "P-Paps what are you doing!" Again Papyrus shrugs.  
  
"you wanted to know why it was good you told me." Papyrus hooks his fingers onto Sans' belt. Sans pushes him away.  
  
"L-later."

* * *

  
Sans peeks around a tree. Papyrus is asleep at his post.  _Perfect,_ he thinks. Sans crawls between Papyrus' legs, pushes them apart, and grabs Papyrus' hips. Papyrus wakes up and stares down at Sans.  
  
"uh?"  
  
"I-I want to do it!"  
  
"d.. do you know what you're doing?"  
  
"I'm not a child." Sans carefully unzips Papyrus' shorts. Okay, step one down. But nothing popped out. Guess Papyrus wasn't actually that prepared. "Oh." Sans thinks for a moment, and starts licking anyway. He carefully sucks on the front of Papyrus' pelvis. The taller groans and leans forward, hiding his face in his hands. Sans stops for a moment. "A-are you okay?"  
  
"i'm fine, k-keep it up." Sans does. He keeps a firm grip on Papyrus' hips, making small laps on Papyrus' pubic crest. He spots a small orange glow in front of his face, and leans back. Papyrus' magic pools, creating a cock. It's long, and slightly thickens at the base.  
  
"Wowzers..." Sans trails his fingers up the underside of Papyrus' cock, watching it twitch and smiling at Papyrus' gasping reaction. He tilts his head and sucks the side of it, closing his eyes. Papyrus moans, covers his mouth, and keeps quiet. Sans is so happy! He licks up the side of it, and sucks on the tip, just the tip, while pumping the rest of it with his free hand. The other was holding onto Papyrus' leg with an iron grip. Papyrus groans and hides his face in his arms. Sans sucks in a little more of the other's cock. "Mph."  
  
"g-god, sans, where did you learn to d-do this?"  
  
"'M no' a fild," Sans tries to speak through the thing in his mouth, and Papyrus gasps and bites his tongue.  
  
"ah, don't, don't talk with it in your mouth--" Papyrus freezes and acts natural. A couple is walking down the path. Sans notices and decides to tease. He sucks a little more, and starts bobbing his head up and down slowly. Papyrus holds his breath. It takes all he has not to buck his hips forward and shove his dick further into Sans' mouth. The couple stare at him for a moment and he waves awkwardly. He shouldn't open his mouth, might he moan out. Sans sucks as the couple walk away, before pulling off once they're out of sight. Papyrus grumbles.  
  
"what was that for?!" Sans giggles. He idly rubs Papyrus' dick.  
  
"Thought it would be funny, mweheh." Sans keeps rubbing, flicking the precum onto his thumb and using it to lube up the rest of Papyrus' dick. "Besides, why stop for a few passerbys? I want you to feel good." Papyrus moans quietly. It feels so much better to have someone else jerk him off.  
  
"b-because, if people see, the-NNNHahH!" Papyrus cries out once Sans just. sucks the whole thing in. He bobs his head up and down, licking up the precum when he gets to it. Papyrus keels over and hides his face in his arms again. If you saw him from the front you'd think he's praying. Sans moans around Papyrus' dick, vibrating it. Papyrus whines.  
  
"a-ah, god, sans.." Sans giggles and keeps going. His right hand is idly holding the base, sometimes thumbing the underside. He starts moving a bit faster, relishing the feeling of his brother's cock in his mouth, throbbing, twitching. He could tell Papyrus was close, from the way the other was moaning and twitching. He keeps going, waiting for the feeling of his throat being filled.  
  
"mnh- s-sans, i'm- god i'm s-so clo--" Papyrus is cut off my his own cries as he comes, thick, sticky fluid seeming to burst from him and coat Sans' throat. Sans pulls away when the other is all done and coughs. He gulps some of it down and smiles up at Papyrus. His face is still a brilliant bright cyan.  
  
"H-how was that, Papy?"


	8. "Let's visit Red!"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uh, crying? this is a chapter about crying
> 
> super short
> 
> you can look through my writing and see my writing quality slowly diminish over time

"th-that was amazing, sans.." Papyrus pants, resting his head in his arms. Sans zips the other up and sits on his lap, pushing his chest back so he's sitting up.  
  
"So, you weren't lying?"  
  
"wh.. why would i lie?"  
  
"To make me feel better," Sans replies. Papyrus looks away for a moment. It did take a bit of convincing for him to feel this way about Sans. But, if he didn't want this, he wouldn't have let Sans do this. Right? What was he even thinking about while Sans did that? He couldn't remember, maybe he wasn't thinking. He shakes his head and smiles at his little brother.  
  
"i love you, you know that." Sans smiles at this. He rests his face on his brother's chest for a bit, thinking about what to do now.  
  
"Hey, let's go visit Red!"  
  
"what about work?"  
  
"I feel like Red is more important." Blue jumps off his brother and runs around in a tiny circle. "He's gotta know!"  
  
"what we did?"  
  
"We love each other!" He hops up and down next to Papyrus. "C'mon, teleport us there!" Papyrus rolls his eyes(?) and picks Sans up. He closes Sans' eyes, and the next time they're open, they're in Underfell. Sans crawls out of Papyrus' hold and runs to Red's house. Papyrus is close behind him, just in case anyone might think it's funny to take Sans. Sans slams into Red's house and is about to shout a warm welcome to himself when he hears... crying. He stands up straight and looks over at the couch, two white pinpricks staring back at him. Red's never had two eyes before, not in front of Sans. He's just had one glowing red eye. Sans puts a hand on his own chest and walks over to Red.  
  
"What's wrong?" Papyrus walks in the house and looks over at the two. He closes the door behind him.  
  
"wh-what? b-blue how're you here..? stretch? i thought you said h-he died.." He somehow manages to say this between sobs. Stretch says something about a reset. Red sits up. "it didn't reset here.. i guess we do have different humans." Red wraps his arms around Sans and holds him, rocking. God he's so happy. So relieved he can see Sans again in this lifetime. Sans would never deserve to die like that. Sans awkwardly pats Red's back.  
  
"U-uh, well, this is uh, strange. I'm not dead? Why would I be?"  
  
"b-blue, you died.. you died but your world reset, and now you're alive, and i couldn't bear to know that i'd never get to see you again..." Sans giggles a bit to himself.  
  
"Well, you can't get rid of me for long." He picks Red up a little and hugs him back, smiling. Papyrus sits down next to them and doesn't bother them. He is a little bothered himself though, when he sees that adorable cyan blush on Sans' face, and a cherry red blush on Red's. He flicks on the TV and turns it down. His usual apathetic expression is slowly returning. Right now, just gotta let the two smols cry it out, laugh, and have fun together, since one thought the other was dead. Well, the other  _was_ dead, but resets are weird and sometimes a blessing.  
  
Red kisses Sans.


	9. Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uh
> 
> i dont know what to put here anymore
> 
> get ready for what i think is sad

That made Papyrus think.  
  
He didn't even react, he just flopped back on the couch, and stared up at the ceiling. Red and his brother were really going at it, though he knew he'd stop Red if he went to far. Seemed like Sans was happy that Red was so happy. Red kisses his neck and pulls away, saying he's so happy Sans is alive. Sans looks over at Papyrus a bit nervously, as if he's wondering why Papyrus looks.. apathetic again.  
  
Does he really love Sans? He.. he let Sans do  _that_ to him... could he really turn back now? Could he really say, 'I was lying to make you feel better,'? He feels so guilty. Sans.. he knows Sans would probably be happier if he just told the truth in the beginning. Instead, now he'll feel like he's being led on. He can't tell Sans now, Red's there. Red will yell and cry and scream at him, maybe Sans too. Edge, if Edge hears Sans crying, all hell breaks loose. He knew for a while that both Edge and Red have liked his brother for a while, but respected the fact that Sans liked Papyrus. He sighs and closes his eyes, falling asleep was his only escape.  
  
He dreams of that blue figure again. It's clinging to his side, and when he tries to push it away, it melts and sticks to him, with thick ropes of sticky blue ooze sticking to his side and squishing between his fingers. It's becoming a part of him. It cries out in pain if he scrapes it off. Papyrus puts his hands on his face and cries out. He wants to wake up, he wants to wake up--  
  
"...Papyrus! Wake up!" Sans shakes Papyrus' shoulders lightly. Red's staring. Edge is peeking out of his room. "Papyrus, we gotta go home now." Paps nods and stands up, holding Sans. Sans closes his eyes, and when they open they're back home. It didn't even felt like he moved at all. Papyrus sits Sans down on the couch and sits in front of him.  
  
"sans, i have something i need to tell you."  
  
"You were lying, right?"  
  
"...yes."  
  
"I knew it. I knew it, I knew I couldn't be so lucky. That's not my life."

"sans, i'm sorry i didn't tell you earlier. i thought.. i thought i could do it."  
  
"I'd rather you told me earlier than have me live a lie! Did you even want what I did?!"  
  
"i-i don't know.. all i know is that it felt nice.. i don't even think i cared who was doing it but now.." He clenches his hands into fists. "it feels wrong now.."  
  
Sans glares a little. "You didn't have to do this out of pity. I'm not a child. I can deal with rejection. It hurts more now than it would have before! You lied, you lied to me and you knew it, you did it on purpose, with the intention of dragging it out for the rest of my life?! That's not okay! That would never be okay, you should never think that! You let me.. you let me live one of my fantasies, and it was all a  _lie_ _!_ "  
  
Papyrus stares at his hands. "i know it was wrong, i should have told you the truth, i'm sorry."  
  
"Sorry won't cut it! It won't undo it! How would you feel if the person you loved did this to you?! You led me on! I hate you!" Papyrus flinches away. Sans covers his mouth. Tears are starting to bead at his eyes. He runs away, up the stairs, to his room. Papyrus stays sat on the ground, staring at his clenched hands. He watches his vision blur, then clear, watches a tear fall and splash on his hand. "..i'm sorry, i'm so, so sorry. i never wanted to hurt you," He repeats to himself. God damn him. Send him to hell. He wishes he could love Sans back. He wishes Sans' feelings wouldn't be unrequited. But he knows he can't force himself to fall in love with his own brother. And his brother may never move on. He may have Red, but... will Sans ever actually stop gazing at him with longing, and cry himself to sleep now that.. now that he knows it's impossible to be with him?  
  
Papyrus stands up, but his legs feel weak. He falls forward onto the couch, and watches as more tears fall and darken the green fabric. He curls up and sobs, constantly wiping his face with his sleeve. His sleeves are covered in tears and snot, honey and dirt. He turns and faces the back of the couch. Soon his crying dies down and he's just taking short, snotty breaths. He falls asleep and-- thankfully-- doesn't dream.  
  


* * *

 Sans slams the door behind him and slides down against it, sitting on the floor against the door. He curls up and cries into his arms. It doesn't take long for him to fall asleep and dream that dream again. A tall, slender orange figure with fizzy edges and uncertain features holding him, rocking him, shushing him. He pushes away, he doesn't like this anymore. His hands are stuck to the figure. He tries to pull with all his might but he can't, it's like super-glue. He sniffs and looks around for help. He spots something red against the gray horizon and calls for it. The red figure draws closer and pulls Sans away from the orange figure like nothing was keeping him there, and replaces the orange figure. Sans is a little reluctant at first. He feels like he knows this red figure. It's about his size and shape and smells like cherries. The red figure wraps its arms around him and he doesn't know how to react. Does he like it? He's just kindof, okay with it. Soon, he lets himself fall asleep with the Red figure. It was nice. It was always there for him.  
  
It helped him get through his unrequited love.


	10. I'm Sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry

Rus hides in his room all day. Sans doesn't bother him. He doesn't even move from his bed. He sits on it all day and stares at the smoke stained wall. He went through an entire pack of cigarettes today. He doesn't keep honey in his room (ants loooove his room for some reason), so he doesn't have anything sweet and intoxicating. He flicks the last butt away and flops back in his bed, bumping his head on the frame but not reacting. He sighs and turns on his side. Sans must really hate him like he said he did. Rus doesn't blame him. He was such an asshole, doing something so tricky to Sans, intending to drag out one horrible lie for the rest of his life. A lie that Sans would have loved but.. it wouldn't be real. Night after night he'd slowly lose more and more of his happiness. They'd do things together.. dirty things that Rus thinks brothers should never share. He'd be a husk, and maybe Sans wouldn't even notice.  
  


* * *

  
Sans runs outside when he wakes up, not even bothering to change out of his dirty clothes. He looks to his sides, trying to remember where that place was. That place where the universes merge. It was in Snowdin Forest, and sometimes it moved over a bit. He runs towards the forest and finds the spot. It's dark and colder than the rest of the forest, and if you walk in the right direction you can go to any universe you want. He knows which way Underfell is. It's the darkest spot of this place. Though, there were other universes he hasn't seen yet. There's one that's right next to Underfell that looks very light. He's always wanted to explore it but he never got the chance. Now's not the time. He shakes his head quickly and runs to the dark spot, tripping over and falling. He gets up and observes his surroundings.  
  
Dark and dreary. Smelling of dust and blood. He spots people slinking in the trees, eyes locking on him and seeming to love the sight of someone so innocent and small. Sans nervously starts for town. He can still feel the eyes locked on him, can hear the quiet crunch of snow under feet. He breaks into a run and hears the surrounding foot steps get louder. He hears a growl and someone jumps on him.  
  
"Ahuhuhuhu!" Sans sees six arms block the ground around him. "Oh, my, Sans has told me all about you~ What are you doing in a place like this, Blueberry Muffin?"  
  
It's Muffet. He feels a little safer seeing her, though she's dressed in a dress and not a tux, like he's used to. He sees a belt with guns and knives on the loop and gulps. "I-I'm looking for Sans... the uh, Sans that lives here." Sans looks Muffet in the eye...s. "Are you going to hurt me?"  
  
"Why, deary, of course not! Bones don't taste very good in muffins..." She mutters that Red would kill her anyway. "Although, I am obligated to help you, because Sans..." Her expression turns sour. "God he's such a bitch. He cares a lot about you, you know. If he knew I saw you out here and didn't help you, I'd be stuck with two limbs like all you other plebs." She stands up and helps Sans up.  
  
"What are you doing in Snowdin, Muffet?" Sans asks. Muffet walks along, holding Sans with two of her arms. "There's some competition in town I want to get rid of. A filthy fire monster trying to run my parlor out of business! I'll use him for baking my cakes." Sans shudders and decides to keep quiet. When they get into town he takes the tunnels to Red's house, but not before thanking Muffet (he got a scoff in return). He walks into Red's house and finds Red watching TV and smoking again.  
  
"oh, heya blue. what're you doin' here without your precious papy?" Sans mutters under his breath.  
  
"He was lying to me. Red, he was lying to m-me, he was going to drag it out for the rest of my life." Red sits up. He looks sympathetic, and pats the spot next to him. Sans sits down and covers his face with his hands. "I-I can't believe him.. I can't believe he'd do that..."  
  
"blue, i'm sure he was just trying not to break your heart..."  
  
"But it's broken worse now! And I, I can't look at him the same anymore!" Red wraps an arm around Sans' shoulders and eases into the hug.   
  
"don't beat yourself up about it, it's not your fault. he loves you so much, just not in the same way." Sans starts crying again. He hides his face in Red's shoulder. Red brushes his back and caresses him calmly. "i-i'm here for you..."  
  
Sans is contemplating trying to get in a relationship with Red. But would it be true, or just something to spite Papyrus? Red was his best friend. And he knew Red liked him. But would Red jump into a relationship right after Sans broke up with his brother? He looks Red in the eye and asks, "How much do you like me?"  
  
"a.. a lot." Red stares back into Sans' eyes. God he loves his eyes. Big and blue and inviting. He cups a hand on Sans' cheek. "it's kinda painful. but i guess... i guess you know how it feels." Sans holds the hand Red placed on his face. His face is turning a bright, beautiful cyan.  
  
"Yeah.. I do." The world is silent for as long as they want. Nobody will disturb them, staring into each others' eyes and getting lost. Red dips a finger into Sans' eye socket and he gasps.   
  
"R-Red!"


	11. All over again, but not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey!!! This is going to be the end so far!! I hope you enjoyed, but if you have any questions or think the story isn't properly finished yet, tell me!!! I might start it back up again! I really enjoyed writing this, special thanks to Vidoxi for writing BGT and causing me to make an Ao3 account just to write a story based on hers! Another special thanks to dragonkun/dragonlopa for creating some art that inspired me to write this entiiire fic! Though I just had a rough idea of it then, this would never exist if it weren't for these two! Love ya! I'm very sorry that the chapters get really short. I don't have the best attention span. But I want you all to know, I poured my heart and soul into this story and loved seeing you all love it!

Red licks around the edge of Sans' eyesocket, making him squirm. "R-Red! What're you doing??"  
  
"heh, thought i'd.." He pulls away, "take advantage of the moment?"  
  
"I-I, uhm. That didn't really feel all that good."  
  
"hm. sorry." Red pulls away, keeping a hand on Blue's thigh-bone. They keep staring at each other, like they can see the stars in the others' eyes. And Red can see stars. He sees bright, blue-outlined stars in Sans' pupils, twinkling and singing and saying that he loves him. It's just his imagination. He's never seen anything so beautiful in all the world, in all the years he's been alive. Underfell isn't the place for love. Just for survival, and breeding to keep going, or for sick entertainment when the other doesn't want to. Red moves his hand and squeezes Sans' hand. "you wanna go talk to your brother?" Sans shakes his head. He's always been the wannabe. The one that can't get into the guard. The one that acts cute, that everyone thinks wouldn't last a second without his dear brother... his brother. Almost as if, someone would take him and chop his legs off and--  
  
"blue, let's go to outertale." Sans was lost in thought, staring into Red's eyes, that he didn't even notice the other saying his name until Red repeated it several times.   
  
"Oh.. uh, sure! But, what's Outertale?"  
  
"...Boss told me it's wonderful. he's not the type to throw words like that around." Sans nods and stands up after Red, taking his hand and yelping when the other teleports with no warning. It's different than the way Papyrus does it. It's fast, it feels like the world is spinning. He doubles over when his feet find solid ground and almost pukes. Red sits down next to him, staring at the sky-- sky?? Oh, there's a sky!! And it's filled with stars, no light pollution, just stars and stars and stardust. Sans gasps and stands up. He reaches up into the sky, it feels like he can touch them, like they'll fall out of the cave ceiling at any moment and rain down on him like tiny diamonds. Red stands up too. He jumps. He flies high into the air and slowly comes back down to the grass covered asteroid they were on. He whoops and hollers and laughs like there's no tomorrow. Sans just stares. His eyes wide, his knees shaking, he sits down again and keeps looking up. Tears start to bead at the corners of his eyes, and Red landsnext to him and looks worried.   
  
"blue, what's--"  
  
"I w-wish Papyrus could s-ee th-is..." The tears run down his face, leaving in their wake an uncomfortable sticky feeling. "God he'd love this.. he'd love to see the stars, and he'd love to see the night sky, maybe he'd forget everything that's gone wrong..."  
  
"jeez, blue, you're still thinking about that? he didn't want or mean to hurt you...!" He puts an arm around Sans' shoulders. "please don't cry, blue. you should never have to cry out of sadness like this.." Red plants a kiss on Sans' cheek, bravely. Sans closes his eyes and happily accepts it.  
  


* * *

 

Papyrus is still sitting on his bed. Thinking. Thinking hard about what happened. Yeah. He got that feeling, that feeling in his chest. Yeah, he didn't understand it or acknowledge it. But when he pursued it, it felt.. wrong. For some reason, he couldn't help but think, it felt wrong to be in a relationship with Sans. Was he scared? He was always a coward. Was he trying to be closer to Sans after he died? It's sad he'd have to do that just to feel like he knows more. So it's true. The flip-flop in his soul has come to an end. He loves Sans. But it's too late now. Sans has fled. He hasn't seen him in a few days. He's scared to leave his room. Scared to go back outside and see him dead. See him with Red, or Edge. He's such a fuck-up. He ended it with Sans because he was confused. He shouldn't have lied, though. He shouldn't have promised he'd jump into a relationship like that. Even if he did love Sans that way, Papyrus was never one for a romantic relationship. He should have just said, 'i love you too, sans, but we can't date'. 'i love you too sans, but i can't handle something as serious as that'. It'd be true. Apathy has always been one of his biggest traits. Something like that makes one lazy, and makes one non-committing.   
  
Why couldn't he have said that in the first place?  
  
Because he loves Sans too much. But something like that is too much. It messed with his feelings. It messed with his head. He didn't know how to process it. Someone like Red is better with his brother.  
  
If Sans is happy, he's happy.  
  
And Papyrus is stuck with feelings going unrequited. He closes his eyes and happily accepts it.

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh, isn't this fun? Be sure to comment, critique, and have a nice day!


End file.
